6 weeks old

Yesterday, Lochlan was 6 weeks old. I can't believe that 6 weeks have gone by since my little miracle baby was helped into this world. The doctors and nurses continue to be amazing. It still blows my mind the things that they are able to do to keep these lil ones alive.

Yesterday was a bit of a mixed bag. He had a great day - they extubated him around 11am and tried him out on CPAP. It was a bit too much for him as he was requiring 70% oxygen. So they decided to switch him to BiPAP. This gives him more assistance but still makes him do some work on him own. He lasted a while but when I called in the early evening they had reintubated him. He tired out. To be honest, I wasn't surprised. When I visited him that afternoon, he did look to be working a lot and seemed to be pretty pooped. Poor lil guy. I told him that I was super proud of him. One of the toughest moments came when I was told that I could have a snuggle and I had to turn it down. It hurts my heart that I needed to but I know that's what was best for him. I still have this tickle in my throat and knew that it just wasn't worth being selfish and end up passing something on to him. But man --- did I ever want to so bad!! I realize that there will be many opporunities to hold him in the near future so that's what gets me through.

I called this morning to check in and he is doing fine. His O2 is still in the 40s but his nurse, Rosemary said that she had been handling him so that could be why. (handling in this instance means that she changed his position to his side which she didn't think he was liking all that much)

His weight last night was 1225 grams. (2 pounds 12 ounces I believe) And it was a lasix day so that is very good news! His feeds are 1ml every 2-4 hours which will hopefully be increased today. For those of you wondering 1cc and 1ml are the same thing. I know sometimes I use cc and sometimes I use ml.

I'm really hoping that I can go see him today. I still have a bit of a tickle in my throat which occasionally causes a tiny cough. I'm praying that it magically disappears by this afternoon so I can go see my baby.

Thank you again and again and again for your positive thoughts and prayers and support. Today, I give a special thank you to some Regi staffers for the meal gift certificates as well as some homemade food; and especially to Mary Elaine for her warmth and generosity. And to the Bayridge Secondary School Staff Association for the beautiful (and super yummy) basket full of goodies.

And I want to thank Lochlan for teaching me what it truly means to never give up! I am incredibly blessed to have been chosen to love and take care of you and I look forward to all of the amazing things you will accomplish.
Love, mommy. xoxoxo