Lochlan feels your prayers. Sometimes I can't help but stare in amazement at how tiny he is. The doctors and nurses are able to do wonders with his care. I still can't believe my little boy is not even 2 pounds. They've increased his fluids and will be starting him on 1cc of breastmilk every 2 hours now instead of 4. And Glenda, his nurse today, said that she thought it was looking like he was trying to take a poop. TMI, perhaps, but hopefully he'll be able to do this on his own because up to this point, they've had to help him go.
Finally, I was able to sit and chat with one of the senior residents about the results of his brain scan last Wednesday. I think I had believed when the nurse said last week that unofficially things were okay meant that he didn't have any bleeding on his brain. Unfortunately, he does. He is at a grade 2. The scale is from 1-4. One and two we were told is nothing to get panicky about. However, if your child has any type of bleeding on the brain, it's hard not to get worried. Grades 3 and 4 are much more concerning. His left side is the one where there is some bleeding but it could be related to all of the stress and pressure in the last week or so since there wasn't any intially one week after he was born. And most likely it will be absorbed back into his body. They are going to do another head ultrasound tomorrow to see what is happening -- whether it is healing, or staying the same, or increasing. Let's pray it is reabsorbing.
Scary. He's been through so much already for not being quite 2 weeks old. He is 27 weeks gestation today. I find myself sometimes craving to be pregnant. I had just started to feel his big kicks a week or so prior to his birth. I miss being pregnant. Sometimes I find myself staring at pregnant moms or moms taking a stroll with their newborns and thinking, that should be me. But I am so thankful that Lochlan is alive and doing well. It's just tough sometimes - I won't lie. But I try to be as postive as I can and be thankful for Lochlan's progress and well being up to this point.
I can't believe it's been two weeks (tomorrow) since he was born. Yet I can't wait for it to be 15 weeks so we can hopefully bring him home and feel normal again.
On a postive note, the official results came back from his chest scan. His duct is closed!! : ) Very exciting. That is one of the main reasons they are increasing his fluids. So hopefully now he'll start to put on a little more weight.
Until next time,